VOID

My Colorado Learner’s Permit is VOID and I have a temporary piece of long white paper in my wallet while I await my permanent license. After nearly ten years of not driving in Manhattan, I shifted my way through a road test that included no parallel parking or three-point-turns (though Joseph says they would have been hard-pressed to find a street narrow enough to require a three-pointer with his tiny bean of a Miata!)

Some of you have driven with me from Manzanillo to Mazatlan. From La Paz to Los Cabos. From Oaxaca to San Martín Tilcajete. From Monterrey to San Antonio. And you may wonder why I was at all nervous about passing a road test at this stage.

Sometimes it is easier to live outside of the box. I was afraid of not knowing all the rules. In Mexico, we put out our “all powerful hand” and cars stop for us if we need to change lanes. Here, it was noted that I did not look over my left shoulder when changing lanes (even though the wide canvas of Joseph’s ragtop obliterated any possible advantage). In Mexico “defensive driving” meant keeping out of the voracious potholes. Here it means checking your rearview mirror at every sixty-second interval.

I was afraid of being judged ignorant of the rules.

I have not always been good with rules.

At 55 years old, it felt like a big responsibility when they punched VOID in my Learner’s Permit. Now I can drive on my own. And nobody will tell me where to turn.

I expect I will get lost quite often. It is my way.

Finding my way back, I learn the road.

With a car, with my feet, on my bike, with my heart and my history.

I am comfy with this VOID.

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